Dear Reader,
The quality of writing in this year's Write a DearReader Contest was outstanding. Today's Honorable Mention piece was written by Nancy Bader. Thank you very much Nancy, for sharing your story with us.
Cheap Is as Cheap Does
Floridians don't need a clock to tell time. If the summer skies open up with a sudden deluge so intense you half-expect to see drenched cats and dogs falling from the sky, you know it's 3:00 pm.
Only, in our family, we didn't call them "deluges." We called them "Jaslow Carwashes," an eponymous designation in honor of my Dad. I won't say that Dad was thrifty or a penny-pincher. No, he was downright cheap. In the more than 60 years that he owned cars, he never went to a commercial carwash, and he never soaped up his car himself. But, if we were in the middle of a conversation at his house and it started raining hard enough, he'd get up, without bothering to excuse himself, open the garage door and back his car out onto the driveway to let Mother Nature clean off the car's surface dirt. If the rain kept up long enough, he'd back my mother's car out, too.
It didn't matter what we were talking about--life, death or taxes, world-altering news or neighborhood gossip--or whether he'd "washed" the car the day before. Any heavy rain warranted a Jaslow Carwash. When I lived in Florida, near my folks, the local newspaper columnist ran a contest to find the cheapest reader. He reasoned that, in a state where the Unofficial State Bird was the "Early Bird (dinner)," there must be some real cheapskates out there. He wanted to find the worst--or the best, depending on how you looked at it. There wouldn't be any prizes. Prizes would defeat the whole idea of being cheap. But you would earn bragging rights.
I told the family I was going to write about "the Jaslow Carwash." Everyone said it was a great idea, except Dad, who couldn't fathom why we thought it implied he was cheap. He maintained that he was just taking advantage of an opportunity.
I submitted my entry, certain that Dad would be named the Cheapest of the Cheap. After all, the story had been circulated so often and so widely that not only did relatives and neighbors talk about going for a Jaslow Carwash, so did friends who had heard the story but had never even met my father.
Alas, victory was not to be. I came in second.
First place went to a couple who, each year on their anniversary, would go to a local Hallmark card store. They'd split up and go to different anniversary card aisles and peruse the offerings until they found a card they thought their mate would like. They would show the cards to each other, kiss, replace the cards on the rack and go home.
They may have earned the right to call themselves Florida's Cheapest Couple, but I bet they pay to get their cars washed.
Nancy Bader
Honorable Mention, 2020 Write a DearReader Contest
Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.
Suzanne Beecher
[email protected]
AUTHORBUZZ: With so many new books out every week, we promise this title deserves your attention:
(Fiction) THE DEAD HEAT OF SUMMER by Heather Graham
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