Dear Reader,
Sometimes life gets in the way of writing, but not this year for Debbie Kosinski, one of the Honorable Mention writers in this year's Write a DearReader Contest.
I wrote my first novel around the time I graduated from high school. A novella, really. I followed that with another novel in college, and a third written during graduate school. I specify that I wrote the novels, pen-to-paper, free-flowing ideas. I didn't edit, I didn't rewrite. I most certainly never attempted to even think about trying to get anything published. I was way too busy, what with school, extra-curricular activities, friends and summer jobs. I would have plenty of time for my novel once I was finished with school. Right? There was never a question in my mind. I just assumed. Of course I would write and publish a novel once all my schooling was done.
But it didn't work out that way. Once I got my degree, I immediately started a super-intense internship. Then it was my first "real" job. I was working all the time, and when I wasn't working, I was dating or out with friends. The little time I was home and not sleeping, I was too exhausted to write. But that was okay, once I was settled, once my career took off, once I was married with kids, I could work part-time and then I would have plenty of time to write. Right?
Okay, so now all you working moms out there can stop laughing at me. Because that's where I am now. I am a working mom, vice president of the PTA, chauffeur, house-cleaner and cook extraordinaire. Oh yes, I do it all. You know what I don't do? Write.
I cringe when I hear the phrase "Writers write." Everyone's busy, just make the time. If you really want to write, you will find the time. But I can't and I don't. I am too tired. I should write at six am, after my shower and before I have to wake the kids for school. But I have to make and pack school lunches, feed the cats and walk the dog. I should write after the kids go to sleep, but after I check homework and clean up after dinner, I fall asleep on the couch in front of the television.
I don't even know what happened to all the great ideas I used to have. It's like my tired, overworked brain has shut down on me, my ideas have dried up, and I worry that I will never be inspired to write again.
That can't be true, can it? It has been over ten years since I last scribbled my novel in a college-lined notebook. But I still hold on to my dream of someday being a published author. Once the kids go off to college, once I can retire from the work-a-day world, then I'll have plenty of time to write. Right? And then, albeit thirty or so years later then I once imagined, I hope, I really, really hope my ideas and my energy will come flooding back, and I will finally complete my novel.
Debbie Kosinski
Honorable Mention
Write a DearReader Contest 2018
Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.
Suzanne Beecher
[email protected]
* This month's Penguin Classics book is THE BOOK OF EMMA REYES: A MEMOIR, by Emma Reyes. I have a copy of the book to share with a lucky reader, so start reading and enter for your chance to win.
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