Dear Reader Column 12-22-08

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Dear Reader,

I had a good cry yesterday. The holidays are a fun and magical time, but they're also filled with memories. Family and friends who aren't with me any longer and friends who are fighting cancer right now, these thoughts are all mixed in with visions of sugar plums dancing in my head.

I guess I'm mentioning this because yesterday when I interacted with an obviously very angry man in the aisle of the supermarket, at first I was feeling pretty upset with the guy, even caught myself thinking, 'What's his problem? Why is he being such a nasty person, especially around the holidays?'

But then I reminded myself that life is complicated, especially this time of year. Life goes on like any other day, people lose their jobs, families are split apart, folks are feeling lonely because this is the first Christmas since their spouse passed away, and others are worried their parents might not be around to celebrate next year.

I had a good cry yesterday--and now I feel much better. I sure hope the man I met in the supermarket gives himself that gift, too.

* There are still presents in Santa's bag and I'm giving them away, today and tomorrow. Click on the link, share your New Year's resolution and you'll be entered in the drawing. Go to: http://tinyurl.com/5teedk

Friday's winners were: Dorothea Lam, Margaret Ann McCurry, Carol Neill and Lisa Hull.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
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Comments

[Nina]

Amen, Suzanne. While I still may catch myself frowning at an affront by a stranger, friend or family I keep myself aware of my ignorance of their 'problems'. And it needn't even be "their" problems because I,too,am edgy in light of all that's going on in the world that makes me anxious and impatient even with myself without knowing it or why... on top of those very legitimate reasons you listed (ALL of the above)that I have of my own!!
Newton's 3rd law: "For every action there's an equal and opposite reaction" helps me keep a grip on my actions & reactions. And while I often chuckle, thinking that my "ungracious" act must be causing a gracious act somewhere:)) I try to make sure that I am the equal and opposite of an ungracious act. And always I am grateful for the reminder of those who respond graciously to my ill-placed impatience and anxiety toward them. There are times it simply feels good and relieves tension to growl at some poor undeserving soul who we may never see again. But it also feels good to give slack as the recipient of an undeserved growl. While I don't feel like Ho-Ho-Ho-ing I do try to be conscious of projecting a pleasant expression in the presence of others. And like you, feel the tears running down my cheeks when I'm alone.. and then I pray for 'everyone'. Thanks for sharing...Nina

[Nina]

It's Nina again. I just read your Anniversary column and posted the 3rd Comment. Hope it inspires others to share their 'spouse-spoilers' that you might revisit in a DR column as Recipes for Home Remedies. Great stuff. Thanks,