Dear Reader Column 08-30-07

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Dear Reader,

Every other Wednesday, before my housekeeper shows up, somehow I manage to find a place to hide our messy stuff. After she leaves, everything looks tidy, the air smells clean and it feels like our house is just the right size. When I look around I see a quaint, comfortable, historical home, but as the week progresses, my house gets smaller and smaller. I pull things out of the drawer, but some things never make it back. Why keep putting my tennis shoes and hat back in the closet, when I'm just going to have to retrieve them again tomorrow morning when I go for my walk? If company were coming--company who I felt the need to hide the everyday me from--in thirty minutes, I could have myself hidden away again. But maybe as long as the house is clean, what's the harm in having the real me, hanging out--all over--in every room?

Perhaps I should think of the everyday stuff sitting out in the open around my house, as "family photos." My hat is really a "picture" of me--I'm just not in it at the moment. The playpen in the middle of my living room, each time I walk by it I'm reminded of Baby Paul. Those newspapers haphazardly stacked in the corner, they're a picture-perfect shot of my husband. He loves to read the Wall Street Journal. And the plastic ball with the noisy bell, the next time I step on it with my bare feet, instead of chastising myself, "Why the heck don't I keep that thing picked up?" I'll think of Abby, my gray kitty and how cute she looks when she's batting it around the floor.

There's a limit to everything and I suppose there's even a limit to how many "family photos" one house can possess. But for right now, my little mental ruse is working. When I look around, my house isn't filled with messy stuff--it's filled with "family photos." "Oh look at that, my husband let his chili bowl sit out overnight and the heat from it left a ring on my new end table. What a treat!" It's one of those "forever" family photos I'll never forget. Now every time I walk by my brand new end table, the one that took me months to find, that "picture" will always remind me of my husband, and how much he loves my chili. Isn't that sweet?

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
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http://www.DearReader.com

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Comments

[Sharon]

Yours is the sanest, most humane and heartwarming take on normal clutter I've heard in years.

We live in a small condo I bought when I was single. It was just right for one person with a whole lot of craft interests and a small dog with a few favorite toys. Then I got married. Now the place is floor to ceiling clutter. Mostly, I'm okay with it unless company is coming, but when I go through a couple of times a year and clean it to magazine layout perfection, my hub gets jittery and cranky and says it doesn't feel homey when it's so bare. I was telling a friend about this and she said, "I like coming to your house when you're in the middle of several projects at once. There's something about seeing all that stuff out that makes me think real life is going on."

[Audrey]

You are a special treat. I love your perspective!

[Karschtl]

I keep your chapter-mails in a special mailbox and read them whenever I have time (which is not daily...) That's why I read this column only today. It describes perfectly how it looks in my home, I just never got the idea to refer to these things as "family photos". I LOVE that idea, and it's so true!!

Plus: Now I have the perfect 'excuse' whenever friends of mine - whose flats are almost spotless - come over and not everything is extremly tidy. Thank You!!