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April 25, 2006

Comments

carolyn teasley

your dear readers today really hit home w/me today. my mom and i don't always see eye to eye on different issues. but i still try to keep the line of communication open between us. there are times i have to call or visit less frequently. my sisters understand why and give me encouragement. my brother has the same problem w/mom and can go weeks at a time without contact even though he lives closer to her than i do. i almost would give him a copy of your letter to readers if i thought it would do any good. on a lighter note---have you ever thought of writing a book? your letters to readers are my favorite part of the book club. i have been known to print off copies for my family and friends to read and enjoy, like the turkey drumstick memory and others. keep writing and i'll keep reading. one of your many fans.

vicki

Suzanne:
You will probably get many responses from your readers today. This is such an emotional issue that we all face in a variety of ways. My dad died suddenly on Easter sunday morning 10 years ago. Our relationship was ok at the end, but something felt unresolved. This may sound strange, but I have talked to others who had similar experiences. He came to me in a very vivid dream about a month after his passing to let me know everything was ok and he loved me. I'll never forget the feeling. Your columns are an inspiration and a connection to so many people. I, too, clip many of your columns to put in my daytimer in a separate section and re-read on occasion. Thanks for sharing and bringing us all together as we go through this interesting journey.

worker bee

Good day: My office does not permit me to access Realplayer to listen to the book. Are there alternative ways of listening to the book or can you post the pages for the public to read? I just hate to miss the good stuff you send. And, I am sorry about your Dad, I think you will always be glad that you told him that you love him. That is the most important thing. Be well and thank you for the nice e-mails.

sunshine

Suzanne, I totally understand - it was the same for but I did get a second chance. Well I wasn't talking to both of my parents for 5 years before and I was fine with it. Better off I would say no more bad days for me. On top of my world. Then about 6 months before that call, I started thinking wow maybe I should bite the bullet and give in - but how do I do that. Then one day at work - my brother calls and I work the hospital, says I have good news and bad news what do you want first - I say well go with the bad news first he says well I got fired from my job. I say well bad is right - then I say go for the good news he says well not sure how you will think it but dad had a massive heart attack and is in your hospital on the 5th floor. Wow what to do - so I decided this was it I will go up and see him. It was a nice little visit kind of uncomfortable but we made it through. Ended up he had bad heart damage but they couldn't operate. He got to go home and things were going pretty good then 7 months later he is sitting in my office and telling me that he was in emergency again the night before maybe a blood clot in his lungs - thought it was another heart attack - well back to emerg for follow up he went - Then there was my mom and dad back in my office - here is the news - Lung and bone cancer. he choose not to fight it and died 3 months later. We never truely got back to the father daughter relationship but I did my part I was there for all of the terrible disease and I made it for the last breathe. I am glad I did and I feel like I did enough as I really don't harp on what happened and do feel the loss and I have peace. It has been 4 years since he died. I can't say this enough our parents are just what they are - if you have troubles do what you have to do but try to be there when needed for your own sake. I am glad Suzanne that you did the right thing.

Peggy

You are such an authentic person, and I really appreciate that you shared this part of your life. The older I get, the more I realize parents are humans too, and we're all just doing the best we can in life. As a parent myself, there have been times when I've thought "They'll be discussing this one in the therapist's office!" But I have my kids' best interests at heart, and I just keep loving them. I try to transfer those same thoughts to my relationship with my parents. It isn't always easy, but it is somewhat freeing. Thanks for sharing! ~ Peggy

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