Dear Reader Column 6-17-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

One of the secrets of Chef Emeril's success is to "kick it up a notch." But lately, one of my secrets is that I've been kicking things "down" a notch. And surprisingly, it hasn't hurt me, or my work, one little bit.

When my mother died a few weeks ago, I realized that I wasn't going to be able to sustain my usual energy level, so I made some conscious changes in my schedule. I continued to meet my deadlines, and I had the same enthusiasm for work that I've always had, except for one thing...now it was easier to kick the stress level down a notch at the end of the day, in the middle of the day, or whenever I felt that I needed to take a break.

The first time I knocked off early in the afternoon, I kept looking over my shoulder for the work police to come and haul me back to my desk. But not to worry, because later that evening, I cheerfully sat down and finished my work.

I'm hoping this "kicking it down a notch" thing isn't just a phase, because, you know, I rather like it.

I stopped and smelled the roses the other day and I didn't even have to get out of my car. To see what I'm talking about, go to: http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/rose.html

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

P.S. Sample an extra title this week. If You Lived Here, I'd Know Your Name, by Heather Lende. It also has a printable format, so you could print it t and take it with you on your summer activities. I have 10 copies of the book to giveaway to readers. Send me an email, tell me what you think of the book, and you're entered in the drawing. And when you go to the link below you can enter to win a free trip to Alaska.

Enjoy the read. To start reading, go to: http://www.emailbookclub.com/alt/alaska/index.html

Comments

[Evelin]

Suzanne,

I am very sorry to hear/read about your loss. I find it extremally difficult to write as I don not think any words can help.
Please accept my sentiments.

[Jozef Imrich]

One does not create a buzz like the one you created Suzanne without putting some blood and sweat into it...

We are all survivors in a desperate need to survive longer and on a positive note.

Thanks for looking at the lighter side of life ...

'There are times when we must sink to the bottom of our misery to understand truth, just as we must descend to the bottom of a well to see the stars in broad daylight.'
- Vaclav Havel, writer, Czech Republic president (1936- )

[Clea Simon]

Dear Suzanne,

First and foremost, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. For what it's worth, those of us who "know" you via your site are keeping you in our thoughts.

But as for your changing life rhythms, I've got to say, I'm not surprised. Trauma, any crisis, changes us, and not always in predictable ways. My gynecologist -- a classic workaholic -- gave up her practice after 9/11, telling those of us who were long-time patients that she just needed to spend time with her kids. She's teaching now, and very happy. I started writing my first book, "Mad House," within the month of my father's death, although I didn't realize at the time that I was working on a book -- or that his death had in various ways freed and motivated me.

Nietzche wrote, "that which does not kill us makes us stronger," and as conflicted as I am about quoting him, I think on this point he was right.

You will get your strength back. Grief is horribly, terribly enervating and it takes so much longer to recover than we expect. But, yes, you'll probably keep your new life patterns. They work for you now. You've come through this with a better life, a stronger one. I trust that time will bring more blossoms your way.

[Clea Simon]

Dear Suzanne,

First and foremost, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. For what it's worth, those of us who "know" you via your site are keeping you in our thoughts.

But as for your changing life rhythms, I've got to say, I'm not surprised. Trauma, any crisis, changes us, and not always in predictable ways. My gynecologist -- a classic workaholic -- gave up her practice after 9/11, telling those of us who were long-time patients that she just needed to spend time with her kids. She's teaching now, and very happy. I started writing my first book, "Mad House," within the month of my father's death, although I didn't realize at the time that I was working on a book -- or that his death had in various ways freed and motivated me.

Nietzche wrote, "that which does not kill us makes us stronger," and as conflicted as I am about quoting him, I think on this point he was right.

You will get your strength back. Grief is horribly, terribly enervating and it takes so much longer to recover than we expect. But, yes, you'll probably keep your new life patterns. They work for you now. You've come through this with a better life, a stronger one. I trust that time will bring more blossoms your way.