Dear Reader

Dear Reader Column 05-22-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

This week's columns are all about bugs, slugs, snakes and other creepy crawlers. And be sure to enter today's Rattlesnake Egg giveaway.

I don't mind sharing my space with creatures, because I realize they're probably thinking they're the ones that are tolerating me. But the big black snake--the "bigger around than a garden hose" snake, the one that's been hanging around my house lately--we have to come to some sort of an agreement, because he's scaring the bejeebers out of me.

As far as I know, black snakes are harmless. (Usually I want to hear from you if you know something I don't, but not this time. Please don't write and tell me I'm wrong--I think I'd rather be in the dark about what this snake likes to eat.)

Black snakes, at least the one that likes to sun himself on my porch, are docile. He doesn't rattle and he doesn't rise up and hiss at me. We haven't discussed it, but I get the impression that I make him just as nervous as he makes me. There's plenty of sun to go around, so I don't understand why all of sudden this snake wants to sunbathe on my back porch.

Once you nearly step on a snake, then everything that moves, means snake. But after a couple of days with no snake on the steps, I forgot about him--until today, when I went out the back door, stepped down, and put my foot right beside his head. Snake and Suzanne, side-by-side on the same step, he side-winded off, insulted that I'd almost tromped on him--and I was screaming.

There's always a reason for everything and since I've seen some little baby black snakes around lately, maybe this is really a mother snake in desperate need of a few minutes away from her demanding children. Maybe she's searching for a day at the spa--a little sun, and a little snake cocktail, topped off with one of those fancy umbrellas.

I raised four children, and heaven knows, I can relate.

To enter the Rattlesnake Egg giveaway, go to: http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/snake052212.html

* Congratulations to the winners of my most recent apron giveaway: Ivy Shows, Kara Hash and Cornelia Donovan.

* And congratulations to the May Chocolate Chip Cookie Winners: Marcia Barker, Gail Currier, Vickie Rosier and Rita Rae Rogers.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

* This month's Penguin Classics book is FOOLS CROW by James Welch. Start reading now and enter to win a Penguin totebag. Go to: http://tinyurl.com/May12Classics

AUTHORBUZZ: LOVE IS MURDER (Fiction) edited by Sandra Brown

An anthology of short stories penned by some of our most popular romantic suspense authors, LOVE IS MURDER also features stories by writers better known for their thrillers, but who often incorporate into their books the relationship layering that is the trademark of traditional romantic suspense.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on LOVE IS MURDER to find out more about the book and the editor, Sandra Brown. Send her an email, she'd love to hear from you.

Dear Reader Column 05-15-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

The journey of a beautiful, yellow, homemade apron, that used to belong to someone else, then they gave it to me and I used it for several months, and now I've passed it on to Aida, a member of our book club, and I think some day the apron just might be passed on to her niece. How far can an apron travel?

The aprons I love wearing the most, used to belong to somebody else, and I'm hoping that "somebody" was a fantastic cook, and that some of their tasty magic was passed on with the apron.

Aida was one of the winners of my recent apron giveaway and she was kind enough to send photos. A lovely tribute to the women in her family and what aprons mean to them.

To see Aida's photos and to enter today's apron giveaway, go to: http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/Apron051512.html

(Thanks for taking the time to send a photo when you win chocolate chip cookies, a book, an apron, or any of my giveaways. I really appreciate it, and readers do, too.)

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
http://www.muffinsandmayhem.com/

* This month's Penguin Classics book is FOOLS CROW by James Welch. Start reading now and enter to win a Penguin totebag. Go to: http://tinyurl.com/May12Classics

AUTHORBUZZ: EATING FREE (Nonfiction) by Manuel Villacorta

Through many years of experience I have witnessed suffering, deprivation and the demonizing of food. I hope to put an end to that with EATING FREE. I want readers to love and celebrate food. Here's a big revelation: we don't need to cut out whole categories of foods and ingredients to lose weight. You can return to foods you love and celebrate eating again--all while losing one to three pounds a week.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on EATING FREE to find out more about the book and the author, Manuel Villacorta. Send him an email, he'd love to hear from you.

 

Dear Reader Column 05-11-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

"Nesting?" my husband asked, when he saw five huge trash bags filled with shoes and clothes lined up next to the front door. I'd pared down so much, I was even giving away a shoe tree and a clothes rack.

I'd never thought about it until he asked, but my husband's right. There's a burning need inside of me and I can't ignore it. I have to, I must, clean, organize, and clear out my walk-in closet (which is really a small room with french doors adjacent to my bedroom), to make room for the light pink, gently-used bassinet I saw on Craigslist last week. Yes, I'm a grandmother experiencing wild, sometimes out of control urges, in a sympathetic pregnancy. Yes, my daughter-in-law is expecting--and it's a girl!

I may not be craving fish tacos with a dollop of mint chocolate chip ice cream, like my daughter-in-law, but whenever I'm in a store I magically end up in the newborn section admiring anything pink. I've sewn two baby blankets and am working on two more (yes, I'll post pictures when I'm finished). My friend Linda and I scoured consignment shops last week, "Oohing and awing" over tiny dresses and frilly little panties with colorful daisies on the back. I left the store with two overflowing bags. Oh, won't my new granddaughter look cute!

Even my five-year-old grandson Paul is excited about having a sister. He's been practicing feeding the cat with a baby bottle. Three year old James has donated some of his super hero figures, so his new sister will have some "cool" toys. And Paul, the planner in our family, has already organized a grandchildren sleep over. "Grandma, three days after my new sister comes, we can all sleep over at your house, watch a movie and Grandpa can pop popcorn!"

"Yes, Paul, we can all have a sleep over." Though I'm not sure how much sleeping this grandmother will get with a newborn, but in the meantime, I'll be sewing, shopping and preparing a "nest." What a blessing, I can't wait!

* Mmm, good! It's time for my monthly Chocolate Chip Cookie Giveaway and I'd love to bake for you. To see photos of satisfied cookie winners and to enter this month's giveaway, goto: http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/cookie050812.html

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
http://www.muffinsandmayhem.com/

KIDSBUZZ: Meet new authors--send an email, ask a question and they will reply. Plus enter to win a free (signed!) copy of the featured books from Jen Bryant, KALEIDOSCOPE EYES; Sheila Walsh, GABBY'S STICK TO IT DAY; and T.J. Garrison, TREASURES OF THE LOST KNIGHT. For a chance to win free copies, say hello to the authors, and more, see www.authorbuzz.com/kidsbuzz

* This month's Penguin Classics book is FOOLS CROW by James Welch. Start reading now and enter to win a Penguin totebag. Go to: http://tinyurl.com/May12Classics

AUTHORBUZZ: SALVAGE THE BONES (Fiction) by Jesmyn Ward

SALVAGE THE BONES follows Esch, a 15 year-old girl in coastal Mississippi, and her family through the 10 days preceding Hurricane Katrina, and through the immediate aftermath of the storm. Esch's mother died in childbirth, so her family consists of all men: her brothers and her father, who don't really know how to usher Esch into womanhood when she finds she is pregnant at the beginning of the book. Even though this book is about a hurricane, it's about so much more than a hurricane: about fighting and love and loyalty and survival and hope.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on SALVAGE THE BONES to read more and to email author Jesmyn Ward, you'll get a reply.

Dear Reader Column 04-27-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

Ta-da! Today I'm doing a bit of housecleaning, which means I have good stuff--great stuff--to giveaway to readers.

My shelves are filled with vintage aprons, books, books, and more books. Can you lend me hand? Folks just like you really win things at the book clubs. Start your weekend with a bit of fun. To see a photo of Donna Easley, a happy, recent book winner and to enter today's giveaway, go to: http://tinyurl.com/DRclear

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Warmest regards,
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: YELLOW CROCUS (Fiction) by Laila Ibrahim

The image of Lisbeth, a white baby, breastfeeding in the loving arms of Mattie, an enslaved wet nurse came to me in a flash. These characters started to haunt me. Though I had never written anything, I was being called to tell their story. For my fortieth birthday, began the personal odyssey of writing my first novel. I hope you will come to love Mattie and Lisbeth as much as I have. I love to speak with book clubs and hear from readers.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on YELLOW CROCUS to read more and to email author Laila Ibrahim, you'll get a reply.

Dear Reader Column 04-17-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

Tax day, this year, it was a no-brainer for me. Because I decided that since I freely open up and write about every little thing in my life, that every little thing in my life should be a tax write-off, even my underwear. (Remember the column I did about my Day-of-the-Week underwear when I was a kid?) Bags and bags of receipts marked 'Suzanne's Life in 2011' are neatly bundled up and stored in my closet, in case the taxman decides to visit and challenge my business write-offs.

Other writers do it, why not me? Travel authors book a flight to France, stay in a suite at the Ritz, order room service and visit the spa. I ask you, does a full body massage really feel different in France than it does in Detroit? Yet it's a research-for-their-book tax write-off. So since this girl writes about her life, my entire life is a write-off (but only in tax terminology). Hair curlers, heating pads, shoes, toilet paper, flowers and trees, that cute little black dress hanging in my closet, cats, bubble machines, the carpet I had installed in my family room, my new bathtub faucet--column number 1657, heck, even my husband should be a business write-off. Because frequently I write about my dear husband too; column number 557 when he was up at 3 a.m. filling hot water bottles for the stray cats we take care of because we were experiencing freezing temperatures here in Florida, and then there was column number 843, when my husband got a No U-Turn ticket and was reenacting the scene (incorrectly, I might add) on my kitchen counter when I needed to make my morning coffee.

It all sounds logical to me, but when I gave my tax return that one last look-see, just to make sure I didn't make any mistakes, before I filed it electronically--there may be a couple of items I might have forgotten to write about (strike-that). Let's just say, I might need to refresh your memory in case I need you to testify for me. You clearly remember the column about my new big flat screen TV and how nicely it fits on my fireplace mantle, don't you? And I'm sure, if an IRS agent questioned you, you'd also vividly recall reading about the hot tub I installed on my back patio, right?

One final note: if you happen to work for the IRS, my husband wants to assure you that we're not really married, and he'll be filing his taxes separately this year!

*Congratulations to the winners of THE EARTH MOVED by last week's guest columnist, Amy Stewart: Carol Custer, Linda Slusher, Chris Kline, Sheila Walman and Flo Kropilak.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: THE IGUANA TREE (Fiction) by Michel Stone

What would you risk if you believed your perfect existence lay just beyond the river? Would anything hold you back? What would you do if you were twenty years old, you loved your baby and your spouse in a way that caused your heart to ache, and you believed if you could just get your family across that line, none of you would ever want again?

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on THE IGUANA TREE to find out more about the book and the author, Michel Stone. Send her an email, she'd love to hear from you.

Dear Reader Column 04-05-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

Extra candles on the cake, extra inches on my shorts. With each passing year I'm embarrassed to say my shorts get longer. I suspect other people don't really notice, but not me. I've been doing the math and as the years have added up, so have the inches on my shorts. In my early twenties, I wore three inch shorts, then in my 30s it was 4 and 5-inch shorts, the 6, 7, and 8-inch years--they were a blur--and last year's shorts came in at 9-inches long. And now this year, when I tried on my shorts and decided that another inch would make me feel more comfortable, I was shocked to discover that the number 10 doesn't follow nine. Nope, now that I've graduated from wearing 9-inch shorts, my options come in twos, 11 or 13-inch lengths. French walking shorts, Bermuda shorts, sassy cuffed shorts, catalog marketers try to appease baby boomers like myself with fancy descriptions of these longer shorts, but let's face it, what I'm looking for now is old lady shorts that don't look like old lady shorts! Where did the years go?

In my search for "it's-safe-to-bend-over" shorts, (but not old lady shorts) I finally spotted a pair on a woman standing in line in front of me at the rib shack. So while she was waiting for her order I asked, "Those are great looking shorts. Where did you get them?"

She couldn't remember where she bought them, and after a failed attempt to twist around to try to read the label herself, she pulled open the back of her shorts, "I can't see the label," she said, "but go ahead and look in my pants. So I did. And after I visit the Jones New York store at the outlet mall, I'll be wearing adorable old lady shorts, too!

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: THE FLOWER READER (Fiction) by Elizabeth Loupas

Rinette Leslie of Granmuir has the ancient gift of divining with flowers. She also has a silver casket full of secrets, including quatrains by Nostradamus revealing the past, present and future of the exquisite young Mary Queen of Scots. Rinette refuses to give up the casket until her husband's murderer is brought to justice, but ruthless lords--and ladies--in Scotland, England and France will kill for the casket's secrets...

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on THE FLOWER READER to find out more about the book and the author, Elizabeth Loupas. Send her an email, she'd love to hear from you.

*Fun, free books and meet authors. Ask questions, they'll reply and read samples from their books. Visit AuthorBuzz at: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

(Fiction)
THE DISCOVERY by Dan Walsh

(Nonfiction)
PATTERNS OF GRACE by Debbie Macomber

(Fiction)
RED WEATHER by Janet Mcadams

(Fiction)
THE FLOWER READER by Elizabeth Loupas

(Fiction)
THE TENTH SAINT by D.J. Niko

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader Column 03-22-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

I'm a human divining rod. Just let me loose and if there's water nearby, I'm the gal to find it. There are a lot of things in life you can't count on, but if I'm in my stocking feet and an ice cube falls on the floor and melts, I'll find the puddle first and step right in it. Yep, put your money on me, I'm a real safe bet.

If the cat's tipped over his water dish (at least that's what I'm hoping it was), or if my husband forgot to get a towel before he soaked in the tub, soggy socks aren't far behind--because I'm sure to follow in his footsteps. I hate wet socks, don't you?

But my dear husband appreciates my talent and even brags to our friends about it. Our historical home, built in 1926, has a flat roof. Flat roofs are notorious for leaks. So every time it rains, my husband sends me on the hunt for possible leaks. "Put your socks on Suzanne, it rained last night." He's always so proud when I find a leak.

I admit I've always dreamed of having a claim-to-fame, but water and soggy socks weren't really what I'd envisioned. Nevertheless, when you're good, you're good, and word of my talent is spreading. Our neighbors called the other day. They've been smelling mildew in their house, and they can't find the water leak. "Can you make a house call, Suzanne?"

*Congratulations to the winners of Guest Columnist Dan Chaon's book, STAY AWAKE: Barbara Boik, Jo Forgach and Geri LaBreck.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: GREAT NEGOTIATIONS: Agreements that Changed the Modern World (Nonfiction) by Fredrik Stanton

The stories of the highest stakes poker games in history, from Benjamin Franklin securing crucial French support for the American Revolution to Reagan and Gorbachev eliminating an entire class of nuclear weapons.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on GREAT NEGOTIATIONS: to find out more about the book and the author, Fredrik Stanton. Send him an email, he'd love to hear from you.

*Fun, free books and meet authors. Ask questions, they'll reply and read samples from their books. Visit AuthorBuzz at: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

(Nonfiction)
AWKWARD MOMENTS WITH MEN: Stories About the Sex We Can't Live Without by Megan Leigh Byrd and Shannon Lee Miller

(Nonfiction)
LITTLE MISS MERIT BADGE by Ronda Beaman

(Fiction)
THE GIRL WHO WOULD SPEAK FOR THE DEAD by Paul Elwork

(Nonfiction)
GREAT NEGOTIATIONS: Agreements that Changed the Modern World by Fredrik Stanton

(Fiction)
YELLOW CROCUS: A NOVEL by Laila Ibrahim

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

* This month's Penguin Classics book is THE LIFE OF JOHN THOMPSON, A FUGITIVE SLAVE by John Thompson. Start reading now and enter to win a Penguin totebag. Go to: http://tinyurl.com/March12Classics

 

 

 

Dear Reader Column 03-08-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

Today's guest columnist offers one of the most interesting "story behind the book" columns that I've ever read, and she has a very unique giveaway for readers.

When I read M.J. Rose's latest release, The Book of Lost Fragrances, I was as mesmerized by the glossary of research at the beginning of the book, as I was by the story. I'm a dedicated nonfiction reader, but The Book of Lost Fragrances was so engaging that I couldn't put it down.

Please welcome today's guest columnist, author M.J. Rose. Send her a welcome email, read her book, and hopefully you'll be one of the ten readers to receive a sample of the perfume that Joya Studio created after reading The Book of Lost Fragrances.

Email M.J.Rose at: LostFragrances@gmail.com

The Story Behind The Book of Lost Fragrances by M.J. Rose

Several years ago, I went to a brocante--a flea market--in Cannes, France. It was a perfect morning to peruse antiques; warm with a little breeze to mingle the scent of fresh flowers with seaside town's fresh salty air.

One table that caught my attention offered an intriguing mix of items laid out as if they were resting on an elegant woman's vanity.

Next to a shagreen jewelry box--opened to reveal strings of pearls, was a pair of fine creamy white kid gloves. Sunshine glinted off the silver trim of a turquoise cloisonne hair brush set and illuminated the gold lettering on a group of leather bound books all about mythology.

There were also a dozen perfume decanters scattered around. Some were cut crystal with fancy repousee silver caps. Others were intricately sculpted pieces of glasswork--the kind created by Lalique and Baccarat in the late 19th and early 20th century.

Sadly all the bottles were empty except for one with an inch or so of thick, dark perfume coating the bottom. It was the least ornate flacon. A residue of glue was visible to show where a label had once been pasted. It was capped with a green ceramic stopper shaped into a lotus--a flower that I recognized from Ancient Egyptian tomb paintings.

As I daydreamed about the woman who'd owned all these treasures, I picked up the bottle, uncapped it and sniffed.

In Remembrance of Things Past, Proust wrote about how the taste and smell of a Madeline returned him to his youth with an immediacy that nothing else ever had.

For me it was the scent in that bottle that returned me to a day years before.

Suddenly I wasn't in the square in front of the Hotel De Ville in that French town but was sixteen years old, standing on the hill overlooking Bethesda Fountain in Central Park, talking to a boy who I'd just met.

He was telling me about Plato's theory of soul mates.

And I was falling in love.

The scent in the bottle in the flea market was his scent. He'd worn a cologne--discontinued before he was even born--that he'd found in a house his parents had rented one summer.

It had been so long since I'd even smelled it--or even thought of it. But suddenly everything about that meeting--and learning about soul mates--and being sure I'd found one--and the tall boy with sly smile who had sadly long since died--came rushing back in that one inhalation.

The Book of Lost Fragrances is a very much a suspense novel weaving history into a tense hunt for a important treasure but the theme for book--an ancient scent that would help people identify their soul mates--came to life that lazy day in the south of France.

I bought the bottle from the antique dealer and it sits on a shelf with the rest of my perfume collection. I've never opened it again--I don't want the scent to evaporate any more quickly than nature will insist upon.

It's enough to know that memories lay captured inside and they were strong enough to inspire a novel.

Ten people who write me at LostFragrances@gmail.com will get a sample of the perfume that Joya Studio created after reading The Book of Lost Fragrances.

Cheers,
Author, M.J. Rose
Please visit my website: http://www.TheBookOfLostFragrances.com

AUTHORBUZZ: ILLUSION (Science Fiction) by Frank Peretti

A couple married forty years are separated by tragedy, and must overcome obstacles of time, space, and human evil to find each other, and rediscover the love they always had. ILLUSION is a sci-fi mystery and an emotionally stirring story. You'll find yourself entertained, intrigued, and turning pages as fast you can!

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on ILLUSION to find out more about the book and the author, Frank Peretti. Send him an email, he'd love to hear from you.

*Fun, free books and meet authors. Ask questions, they'll reply and read samples from their books. Visit AuthorBuzz at: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

(Fiction)
THE MESSENGER by Siri Mitchell

(Fiction)
LIVING PROOF by Kira Peikoff

(Mystery)
AGONY OF THE LEAVES, A Tea Shop Mystery by Laura Childs

(Science Fiction)
ILLUSION by Frank Peretti

(Nonfiction)
JUICY JOY--7 Simple Steps to Your Glorious, Gutsy Self by Lisa McCourt

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

 

 

 

Dear Reader Column 03-07-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

Thanks for taking the time to write. Susan's been reading at the book clubs for six years and she finally had to ask...

"Hi Suzanne,

Last Friday's column about your pink skirt prompted me to email and ask a question I have been wondering about for some time. Why do you always wear skirts? I can't remember seeing a picture of you in pants or shorts, and I've been reading at the book club for 6 years now. Around here, most women only wear skirts or dresses to church, if even then, but rarely for everyday. You always look so cute in your skirts! I may have to try wearing one myself when the weather warms up.

I always enjoy your column and have discovered so many wonderful new books and authors through the book club. Thank you!"--Susan I.

(Suzanne replies:) Good eye, you are right. I rarely wear pants or shorts. My closet is filled with cotton (throw in the washer) skirts. When the weather gets cool in Florida, I add tights to the ensemble, otherwise I wear white ankle socks with Mary Jane shoes, a brightly colored shirt, accessorized with a pearl necklace and earrings and I top it off with my pink "Muffins and Mayhem" baseball cap. It's become my uniform. Thankfully skirts look cute on me, because all through the generations: great-grandma, my Grandma Hale, and my mother couldn't wear pants unless the waist stretched and allowed for...actually a column I wrote a few years ago says it best.

Every word is true, except over the years, the sizes have changed--but we don't need to go into that.

I keep two sizes of pants in my closet. Size 2 is the real me. Size 4 is my "bloat" size. Lately I have to do most of my eating at the dinner hour, because otherwise I have to change my pants half way through the day. I wear my size 2s before I eat, 4s after I eat, and then 2s later in the day when I "debloat" again. I always look smart. My pants are never wrinkled, because I don't have them on long enough to do any real crease damage.

I know the foods that cause me to expand like a balloon. Sugar is one of them. I try to avoid it. But it's tough. My husband says the problem is that I just don't eat enough of it. His advice is to eat tons of sugar, bloat up like the Goodyear blimp, switch to elastic-waist pants for a week, and get it over with once and for all. Then, my body will adjust and I'll be able to wear the size 2 pants all day long.

I know, I know, you might be thinking at this point, "Look Suzanne, I don't feel any sympathy for someone who starts at a size 2 and bloats to a size 4." But it's all relative, I assure you. If you are wearing a size 2 and you bloat up 4 inches, there just isn't room for expansion. There's no place for the bloat to go.

Well, that's the scoop from my end of the world today. I need to sign off now. I ate lunch 20 minutes ago and it's time to change my pants.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: AGONY OF THE LEAVES, A Tea Shop Mystery by Laura Childs

When tea shop owner Theodosia slips away from serving tea and scones at the Neptune Aquarium, she discovers the body of a man, tangled in a net, in the vast Ocean Wall exhibit. EMTs say the man drowned, but Theodosia spots defensive wounds. Though police aren't keen on her theory, Theodosia chases down a raft of suspects.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on AGONY OF THE LEAVES to read more and to email author Laura Childs, you'll get a reply.

Dear Reader Column 03-02-12

Subscribe to one of Suzanne's online bookclubs and receive her daily
column at: DearReader.com


Sample Suzanne's book at:
Muffins and Mayhem, Recipes for a Happy (if disorderly) Life

AUTHORBUZZ: Discover new books, "meet" the authors and enter to win: Goto: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader

Dear Reader,

It took longer than usual to get dressed today, because I decided to wear a light pink skirt I'd been saving for a special occasion. When I bought the skirt it was on sale. A 65% off sale! Don't ya love it?

Today isn't a special occasion, but this morning--two years later--there it was, on the hanger, staring at me with the 65% off price tag still attached. "When are you going to take me out on the town, Suzanne?" (In case you're wondering what a skirt's voice sounds like, this one sounded desperate to get out of the house, so I decided to oblige.)

First dates take a lot of preparation, even when it's a first date with a skirt. After trying on everything in my closet, I discovered only one top that would "go with" my skirt, a three-quarter sleeve, cream-colored shirt. It did look fabulous, but as I was giving myself that last once-over in the mirror, I discovered a teeny-tiny, tan colored stain. Right up front. Nobody could miss it. Nevertheless, I refused to change. Because it took way too long to find this shirt--so I tried to cover it up instead. A pin didn't fix it, and a scarf looked awkward, but then I noticed the "I Got a Flu Shot" sticker still attached to a shirt hanging in my closet. So peeled the sticker off the old shirt, pressed it on the shirt I was wearing and now (I appear) stain-free.

Actually stain stickers are a great new product idea. Instead of manufacturers including an extra button with a new shirt, they should include an assortment of matching cover-up stickers.

Are you ready to dunk and munch? I'm ready to bake for three lucky book club readers. All you have to do is enter and promise to send a photo. To enter this month's Chocolate Chip Cookie giveaway, go to: http://tinyurl.com/Cookie0212

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.muffinsandmayhem.com

AUTHORBUZZ: HEART OF GOLD (Fiction) by Robin Lee Hatcher

Wells Fargo driver Matthew Dubois has little in common with Shannon. But he's desperate to find a wife to care for his young nephew once his widowed sister dies and Shannon--volunteer caregiver to Matthew's ailing sister--seems perfect. However, Shannon has little interest in a man who is neither a Southerner nor a gentleman...and too much pride to marry if not loved.

Go to: http://authorbuzz.com/dearreader click on HEART OF GOLD to find out more about the book and the author, Robin Lee Hatcher. Send her an email, she'd love to hear from you.