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Dear Reader,
There's a white fainting couch sitting in my living room. It was a mistake. My husband and I realize that now, but at the time, when we were answering the ad: "Fainting couch, priced to sell--today!" We felt like adventurers in search of an eclectic looking piece of furniture.
The address was a short drive away, and when we rang the front doorbell, instantly the garage door opened instead. A beanpole man and a muscular man--I mean muscles popping out all over the place--walked out of the garage. My husband jokingly commented, "Hey, did you know when you ring your doorbell it opens the garage door?"
But beanpole man breezed right past the joke, and sternly announced he had security cameras. "I don't trust anyone, I was kidnapped once." (A very strange greeting; too strange for me to pursue.)
The fainting couch was on display in the garage. "We're entertainers; illusionists, and we're moving to Las Vegas because we're going to be opening a show."
How intriguing, so of course I wanted to hear more. The muscle man, a very personable guy, said he used to be a trapeze artist. His family is circus folks. He grew up performing, flying high in the air, but when he injured a muscle in his arm, he had to leave the circus. Being in the "business" he'd had the opportunity to be introduced, and become friends with Siegfried and Roy, which I assumed had helped the two of them network their way into a show in Vegas.
The couch looked good, my husband gave me a nod, and I announced, "We'll take it. Can one of you help me carry it over to the trailer on the back of our car? My husband isn't supposed to lift something this heavy."
"That will cost you $25.00 more." Typical garage sale humor, I chuckled, but beanpole man's face looked unfriendly, no smile there, and no gesture on his part to lend a hand either.
"Well, how about if I give you a thank you and a smile?" I replied.
"I'm an entertainer, I see smiles all the time."
"Okay, how about if you pick up that end of the sofa, I'll pick up this end, then you can feel important, and we'll be on our way?" (I didn't actually say any of that, it's just one of the various thoughts that went through my mind.)
As we were loading the sofa on the trailer, other furniture buyers pulled up, so away we went. We'd driven almost a mile, when my husband started laughing hysterically. "Suzanne, I just realized we didn't pay those guys! The money is still in my front pocket. Now, that's some kind of illusion!"
But as we were turning the car around, I told my husband, "This is hilarious, but beanpole man isn't going to appreciate the ironic humor. In fact, I predict he'll probably be rude."
Unfortunately I could tell by the look on my husband's face as he was walking back to our car, that beanpole man hadn't found anything humorous about our "illusion." No "thank you," just a mumble that he had our phone number on his caller ID, so he would have tracked us down.
My husband looked a little sad, but I quickly reminded him, "It is funny and we don't have to let someone steal our joy." And we didn't--but we do have a fainting couch sitting in our living room. Yes, it was a mistake in judgment, but at least it turned out to be a humorous adventure, a fun story we'll be able to share with our friends.
In the meantime, "White Fainting Couch, priced to sell, and I'll help you load it in your car, with a smile--for free!"
Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.
* Find recipes for the holidays: http://tinyurl.com/yuf6aq
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
http://www.DearReader.com
SEARCHING FOR YOUR NEXT BIG THRILL? Read the "Between the Lines" feature interview with Sandra Brown then read about great thrillers from: Vincent Zandri, Stephen Coonts, Gina Robinson, Bob Doerr, Al Roker & Dick Lochte, Deborah Shlian & Linda Reid, Patrick Woodrow, Linda O. Johnston, Richard Doetsch and Heather Graham. Go to: http://www.thrillerwriters.org
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