Dear Reader

Dear Reader Column 5-31-05

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Dear Reader,

I wish, oh I wish, I could just once, take something out of the box, plug it in and it would work. I'm not a big fan of magic, but I'd gladly accept a little "slight of hand" and slightly less frustration if just once, something would work the first time around.

So far today, I've tried to install software on my new laptop, hook up a wireless router connection for it, and put together a table. (The manufacturer gave me eight screws, it looks like I'm only supposed to use six, but that's just my educated guess, because they didn't include any instructions and when I called the company, they admitted it's been a real problem. Hundreds of customers have been calling, not only because there aren't any instructions, but there aren't any predrilled holes drilled in the table top either. So if you drill your own holes and the table cracks or the holes are the wrong size...)

Just once, just once, oh I wish...

I thought I'd switch gears, take a relaxing break from the assembly line and do a little writing. I sat down, plugged my headset into my cd player and the sound wouldn't climb above #3 on the dial. I can only write listening to loud music, so okay, where's the instruction manual? Thirty minutes later, instruction manual in hand, I'm on the phone with SONY. While I'm on hold, I reread the manual and just when I hear on the other end of the telephone receiver, "Thanks for calling SONY, this is Anna. May I help you?" Just at that very moment--I figured out the problem.

Miracles do happen--eventually.

"Well, Anna, I had a problem with the volume on my cd player, but while I was waiting for you to come on the line, I solved the problem. But you know, I hate to waste a troubleshooting call, especially one that I've waited 10 minutes on hold for, so..."

Okay, maybe I'll get lucky and just once, just once...

"...Anna, do you know anything about hooking up wireless routers?"

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-30-05

Join over 280,000 readers who read 5-minutes a day with me. To see what we're reading this week, go to: www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader,

I love reading my email. What a treat! Thanks for writing. If your name is in today's email bag, let me know and I'll send you a free book from my book shelf.

From my Email Bag:

"Suzanne, I am a new member to the club and it has renewed my love for books.  If I am hooked by Tuesday's read, then I automatically reserve the book on audio at my library.  I have listened to about half of the books that I was able to preview from you.  I enjoy my commute to work and don't mind the traffic with a good book to listen to.  I even have my husband listening on the days that we carpool." --Jacquelyn Trout

"Don't go anywhere Suzanne...how would I start my day?" --Very Best, Leslie Bolt

"Dear Suzanne, I enjoy your column every morning.  It is my moment of peace. I can escape to another world far from wiping noses, cleaning house, and changing diapers.  I email a friend book suggestions, and she emails me hers. You introduce me to books that I never would have probably picked up and I thank you." --Lori Johnson

"Suzanne, I read your column daily at work and what a wonderful way to start my day. You will never be able to retire as I would not be able to start my day without you." --Denise Masterson

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Warm regards,
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

P.S. the winners of last week's business book, "Lion Taming," by Steve Katz  were: Suzan Herskowitz, Mike Horn, Robert L. Wood, Barb Legere, and Joseph Tsang. And I got so carried away with giving away books that I'll be sending  the book, "Food for Thought," by Philip J. Romano another great business title to the following readers: Ben Crawford, Jack Quick, Bob Young, Jeff  Jankovic, Carol J. Welch, Gail Jackson, Dan bradshaw, Pat Castilow, Chris Andersen, and Raymond Marciniak.

Dear Reader Column 5-27-05

Join the over 280,000 people who read 5-minutes a day with me. To see what we're reading this week, go to: www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader,

"Is there anything I can do for you?"

People have been asking me that question a lot lately since my mother passed away a couple of weeks ago. Asking if they can do anything may seem like such a simple thing, but it's so comforting
to me. I was never quite sure how I could help someone when a person close to them died, but now I realize that it's the little things that make all the difference.

In the small town where my mother lived, people still bring casseroles, cakes, salads and such, by the house when someone has died. They offer to dog sit, they show up and mow the lawn because
it needs it, they drop your dry cleaning off and pick it up for you. They hear that you woke up and your neck is in horrible pain, and because they're a chiropractor and your mother's neighbor, they meet you at their office early in the morning two days in a row, and don't charge you a thing either time. "It's the least I can do," the chiropractor told me.

Cards, emails, flowers, and people sharing with me, "I remember when your mother did such and such...she was so funny...she was such a wonderful woman." These simple words help ease my pain. And letting me talk about my mother--sometimes listening to me tell the same stories over and over again, until I don't feel the need to repeat them anymore--what a gift their listening is to me.

So to all the readers, friends, employees, and business associates who've asked, "Is there anything I can do for you?" Thank you. Your simple question has brought tears to my eyes. Thinking about my mother does that to me these days. But it's okay, because they're slowly beginning to become sweet remembering tears. And when the weeping stops, I smile.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Gratefully,
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-26-05

Join over 280,000 people who read 5-minutes a day with me. To see what books we're reading this week, go to: www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader,

Birthday notes from a reader and me:

"Dear Suzanne, what would it take for you to drink vinegar? If someone offered you a million bucks, for instance, would you take gulp after gulp of the dreadful liquid? How about laryngitis? That's what it took for me.

I'm not talking about taking shots of vinegar, just a teaspoon of apple cider vinegar in a cup of hot water and some honey. If my birthday wasn't in four days (May 27th) and the family party in
three days and this dry cough so persistent, I probably wouldn't be going to such extremes.

I've been surfing the web for old remedies, or any type of  miracle cure. Do you have any tricks up your sleeve that you can share with me? I am a motor-mouth, a chatter-box, a gum-flapper, a constant gabber, and this is torture!"

Sincerely (silent), Pauline
P.S. It's so good to read with friends!


(Suzanne responds:) My oh my, I'm so sorry, Pauline, and it's almost your birthday, too. Yikes! Have a happy one. (Mine is today.) If I knew of a cure, or if I had a magic lamp and the genie gave me three wishes, I'd certainly use a birthday wish for you. But alas, the only thing I've ever heard of is not to talk, so you don't strain your vocal chords and that it's a virus that has to run its course.

When something is driving me nuts, something I don't have any control over, I turn it into an experiment. Since you can't be verbally involved, get a notebook and observe people and their
conversations. For instance, do people crank up the volume of their voice when they're talking to you even though there's nothing wrong with your hearing? (It's only your voice that's not working.) I hope you can find a way to put an interesting spin on your problem. And, might I suggest playing charades at your birthday party? You'll be a natural. <g>

Happy Birthday, Pauline and thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with a birthday girl like you.

Have a Happy One,
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-25-05

Join over 280,000 readers who read 5-minutes a day with me. To see what books we're reading this week, go to www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader,

Whenever I'm getting ready to say something that I feel strongly about, that emotionally touches me, I get all jumbled up. My body gets tense and I'm wishing for a quick dress rehearsal--some time to think it through, but there isn't any. And then to make things even more stressful, suddenly the words don't seem good enough. Maybe I should play it safe and consider exchanging "my" words for some of the "how-to-say-it" suggestions that I've read about in books. "Words guaranteed to make people listen and really 'feel' what you're saying." But the fancy words, the clever phrases--they don't
feel right to me. I'm really better at just being me.

My first couple of sentences may run-on a bit because it takes a moment for me to get used to the "feel" of saying what's really on my mind. And that's okay; a little fumbling makes a person seem more approachable. I'm hoping my simple words will be enough to make a difference, because they come from my heart--they're for real.

Cutting loose with feelings, the stuff that I swore I'd never tell another soul--it's scary. I get anxious, short of breath, and the heat quickly rises up through my body. But for me, that's the
go-ahead sign, the evidence that it's something I really need to say.

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Warm regards,
Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-24-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

Reading your emails is the highlight of my day. Thanks for writing.

From my Email Bag:

"I enjoy your column so much, especially getting to preview new books. At the company I work at, they installed a Spam Blocker on our email. I received your column this morning, although it was 'blocked.' I promptly emailed our administrator and advised him that this was definitely not spam. They then promptly unblocked it so I could get my daily fix!!!" -- A faithful reader, Nancy Leet

"Dear Suzanne, Hi! I just wanted to put in my 2 cents worth. It's always stated that we can just skip reading this book if we don't like it by hitting the delete key. I can't do that because I would miss your daily chats! Even if I don't like the book, I have to read your message just to 'stay in touch'! Keep up the good work as we all enjoy it!" --Liz Tienor

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Warm regards,

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-23-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

"Suzanne, how do you write? Do you write several columns all at once? Or do you write one every day?"

Curious Tom, a book club reader, wants to know.

(Suzanne responds:) Well, Tom, when people ask me what I do for a living and I tell them I write a daily column, their face usually cringes, their shoulders rise up in the air, and they literally have to shake off the scary idea of being on deadline every day.

But surprisingly, the daily deadline part of what I do doesn't even really bother me. I guess because I have the freedom to write about whatever's on my mind. And since my mind is never at rest, and it's a little unique, it's rare that I'm ever at a loss for something to say.

I usually write every day. My column has to be written at least two days before it's published, which means I'm always confused about what day of the week it is. Frequently I'm telling people, "Have a great weekend" on Wednesday, because I've just finished writing Friday's column.

Sometimes I do write several columns on the same day, because I'm having so much fun that I just don't want to stop. But that's really not the best way for me to operate. If I don't write for a few days, it's difficult for me to get back in the routine. In fact, it's painful. I start writing, I'm not pleased with what I've written; I moan about how I won't ever be able to write again; I get up and walk around the room mumbling to myself that I've got to get serious--this is ridiculous, get it together Suzanne--and as soon as I finish my "complaining" walk, that's when it happens. I know that I'm ready to "bring it on home". And I finish my column and I'm back in the writing groove, until the next time that I let a few days go by, and then I go through the exact same routine all over again.

Thanks for asking me about how I write because the next time that I'm on my "complaining" walk, I'm going to interrupt it and reread today's column and remind myself "how it's done."

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

P.S. If you haven't had a chance to sample "The Mermaid Chair," Sue Monk Kidd's new book, here's your chance. We've featured her other book, "The Secret Life of Bees". Enjoy the read.

Go to: http://www.emailbookclub.com/alt/mermaid/mer1.html

Dear Reader Column 5-20-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

From my Email Bag:

If your name is mentioned in today's column, send me an email, include your mailing address, and I'll send you a free "just because" book, from my book shelf. Thanks for writing. I always love to hear from readers.

"Dear Suzanne, your column this past Tuesday, concerning the unique ways to market one's self arrived at a most opportune time for me. Over the weekend, while at a blues show, I was thinking about what to put on the new business cards I need to have printed. It occurred to me that beneath my name I should put "Blues Babe/Chronicler". Blues Babe, because I've dedicated a good part of my life to following the music I love and Chronicler because I write--mostly about music, musicians and the folks who are obsessed with music.

On Monday I decided my idea was silly and I really ought to have a nice, practical, boring, card printed. Well, not any more. If Gretchen can be a Soprano and Office Manager, I can be the Blues Babe/Chronicler."

Yours respectfully,
Pat Fitzgerald Blues Babe/Chronicler

*If you missed Tuesday's (5-17-05) column click on it at the right hand side of this column.

Other readers emailed and shared their new signature lines:

Judy Allswede
Rolex rider/grandmother

Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Dancing girl trapped in middle aged body/Teacher Aide

Rachel Zielinski
Theatrical Stage Manager / Library Technical Assistant

Sheila J Coxe
Ferryboat Captain/ Accountant

Lorinda Eldredge
Sub teacher/ psychologist

Rebecca Spilver
SF-F geek / Librarian Or...New mom / Librarian

Marshall Cook
Closer for the LA Dodgers/ writer

Heather Aristilde
Daycare Owner & Chemist

Gwenette Gaddis Goshert
Novelist and Playwright / Academic Advisor

Jennifer Hrusch
Reformed perfectionist/Librarian

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Warm regards,
Suzanne Beecher
Helicopter pilot / writer
www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-19-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

I've been making the rounds--around my house--getting rid of stuff that looks great, but doesn't provide one iota of comfort or convenience. The white wicker chairs on my side porch were the first to go. Yeah, they looked quaint, but I shouldn't have bought the cheap ones, because after about 15 minutes of sitting, my arms hurt and they had red marks from the imitation wicker.

My solution for the past two years has been to drape a towel over the wicker arm rests--but dish towels pretty much killed the "look"
that I had in mind when I bought the chairs. So I hauled the two cheap, white, wickers out to the corner, put a FREE sign on them, and headed for the store.

My husband never sits on the side porch, so I really only needed to find one perfect chair. And I did. I found a lovely yellow wicker chair (the real thing) complete with cushions, a place to set a bottle of water and a hinged arm rest where I can store books. And, it had its own matching foot stool. I live in a historical home, so my new chair not only "looks" the part, but I look great in it too, and yes, it's comfortable.

I'm so pleased with myself, but I'm also feeling a bit foolish. Why did it take me so long to buy a new chair? But then again, why haven't I pitched the red spatula with the handle that falls off if I flip the burger too far to the left? And then there's my cordless phone--the battery won't hold a charge, so I'm constantly sprinting to grab another phone before I'm talking to dead air.

Okay, I'm making a list: chairs, spatula, phone. My husband wanted to get in on the fun and he suggested that we ditch the VCR player, because it eats every fourth tape we put in it. What a great idea. But then he took things a step too far.

"What about those heels you were wearing last week, Suzanne? Remember, you complained that they were killing your feet. Let's get rid of those, too."

Get rid of my shoes? You've got to be kidding? That's way too practical for me. You've got to draw the line somewhere. You can take my chair, you can take my spatula, you can take my phone, but don't mess with my shoes!

To see my comfy new chair and part of my shoe collection, go to:

http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/chair5.html

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com

Dear Reader Column 5-18-05

Join my email book club. Over 280,000 people read 5-minutes a day. To see what books I'm featuring this week, go to: http://www.dearreader.com/

Dear Reader,

The Rolling Stones insist, "You can't always get what you want." But Rudy, my cat, sings his own version. He realizes if he bugs me long enough, he's guaranteed to get what he wants, because I'm a pushover.

Every day I break the cardinal rule: don't reinforce bad behavior. But gee, he's just so darn cute. I'm usually a sucker for his "it's-all-about-me" attitude, but sometimes it does get annoying, especially when I'm on a deadline. I'm supposed to have copy written in an hour, but Rudy lies on my keyboard and when I try to type, he reaches over, puts his paw on my hand, and gives me that "pet me instead" look. And of course, I do.

To see the "King" in action, go to:
http://www.emailbookclub.com/photo/rudy4.html

Thanks for reading with me. It's so good to read with friends.

Suzanne Beecher
Suzanne@DearReader.com
www.DearReader.com